A garden, truly, is a miniature universe with wonders and pieces of wisdom to showcase. It is not be mere chance, I think, that spending leisure moments in h is garden, Newton discovered and conceptualized gravity. This is but one of infinite perspectives. In the eyes of one who has faith, the garden reveals more. Could this be one reason why ever since I put up my garden, inspiration has never ceased to engulf me, especially when there, I pray regularly? Needless to say, Jesus, whom we believe as God’s ultimate Revelation, discerned and made a crucial decision in a garden; when Jesus prayed, he used to retire, not in a secluded house, but in the cradle of a mountain’s “natural gardens.”

Again, I wish to share a story of wisdom from my garden. It is about one of my garden’s cute citizens, a tiny cocoon whose story has thrown light to my vocation story, and amazingly, turns out also as significant in relation to an important aspect of Jesus’ story, the incarnation. Pardon my voluntary participation in the cast. With utmost humility and modesty, I just can’t help sharing a little piece of light.

The Cocoon’s Story and My Vocation Story. One day, I was just in time to behold a colorful butterfly come out of its cocoon. I was very much expectant of this when I fist saw the cocoon hanging in a bonsai branch. Though it was so ordinary, that sort which is usually taught in elementary science, my sensitivity to its insight was never elusive, most especially because it struck the core of my being.

One who has read my article. Only God’s Will Matters may remember that I am an ex-seminarian. I did not go out the seminary because I like to; neither did my formation directors want me out. I got sick and had to take a rest. That moment, my journey was so painful because I could not reconcile reality with the self-imposed direction I used to hold on to. My greatest dilemma was on the fact that from high school to college seminaries, all the way to theological studies. I invested my whole energy in pursuit of the priesthood.  Be that as it may, after spending half of my life in the seminary, there I was, leaving its portals toward a journey of no return. My most significant question was, “I have tried my best to serve you, why has this happened to me?” I felt I was stripped off of everything for which I worked hard in many hears. I deemed myself abandoned. I was practically left without directions.

Despite difficulties. I managed to survive, and in that opportune moment of watching the butterfly stripped off of its cocoon, a faith-understanding of my vocation story crystallized. The butterfly made me understand my former dilemma. I was miserable because I kept being tied to my ego-propelled, self-centered plans. God willed I had to be formed in my “cocoon,” but I did not realized then that he wanted me to be someone else according to his design. He wanted me to become a “butterfly,” but I was a “reluctant butterfly.” I was not happy therefore because I still wanted to be a “caterpillar.” Unable to perfectly fit round tomatoes in square slices of bread, I danced out to tune to the music and beat of God’s will.

A Precious Treasure. One important treasure I discovered in the insight I drew from the story of the cocoon is the notion of “inner freedom” or “the spirituality of non-expectation.” Vocation necessitates interplay between human freedom and God’s will. Since God knows and wants the best for us, human freedom has to be finely in tune to God’s will so that one’s vocation journey may not follow perilous routes. God’s Spirit dwells in everyone. If only we allow His Spirit to direct our lives, we may be freed from ego-propelled, self-centered expectations that can only lead us nowhere. This constitutes the essence of “inner-freedom” (a freedom which results from the Spirit) or “spirituality of non-expectation” ( a way of life which does not cry over shattered ego-propelled, self-centered plans). Only then can God say his piece clearly and effectively. (For the devil’s advocate who may question the validity of human freedom in this context. I offer a very simple answer. We may freely dance or choose not to dance to the tune of God’s will; hence, human freedom is validly operative.)

I am at peace now since I have learned to accept the “butterfly” God wanted me to be. More importantly, I discovered that in order for one to discern his/her particular vocation, he/she has to discover God’s will at the core3 of his/her being. This leads to a better appreciation of our common vocation to holiness, the foundation of every vocation.

Jesus’ Story. How have the cocoon’s story and my story bear significance in the context of Jesus’ story?

Insights dawn in an unexpected manner. Concomitant to my realization of my vocation story as I read in faith through the cocoon’s story, was an insight about another meaning related to Jesus’ incarnation. Since the aforementioned stories have set the stage for understanding the insights I wish to share, my treatment of the incarnation maybe very brief, but nonetheless most profound.

Like the butterfly in our cocoon story, Jesus had also undergone a sort of metamorphosis in his incarnation. About this, John’s prologue about Jesus becoming man from being the Divine Word, and the kenotic hymn in Philippians 2 are rich sources. From these, we can learn that Jesus’ incarnation was God’s plan, and being an obedient Son, Jesus obeyed; perhaps he struggled as when he prayed hard before finally drinking his cup of suffering. Once precious learning here is that amidst struggles, Jesus always ended up obeying his Father’s will. Hence, in the incarnation, we find a model par excellence of stripping off or “emptying” for the sake of unconditional love and humanity’s salvation, which I think is one context that gives meaning to every vocation. One essence of vocation, therefore, is freedom patterned after Jesus’ inner freedom. Viewed this way the incarnation become at once a paradigm for authentic vocation spirituality in which only god’s will matters.

There goes again a tripartite story whose significance was elicited in my “wisdom garden.” Since God is alive, wonders like this will never cease, especially when God’s will is freely allowed to cultivate and shape us into the vocation he deems fit for us.